Currently Ohkay

Well, I know that I said I wouldn't get caught up in this job, but I most definitely did. Time management was never my strong suit but I have managed thus far. Now, that I work so often my skill has been put up to the test. I have to really plan things out and I can't just wing it anymore. 

This job is making me have to grow up. I don't know if it's a good thing as of right now. I didn't tell my parents about having the job because they told me that having a job takes out of the environment and the true experience of college because you can't focus on school. Which, I agree, it does make you think about other things. But, in the same respect, I find that I consider my deadlines and true use every bit of time I have effectively now. I don't have the job because I have bills to pay. I got it because I wanted a new phone and some pocket change. So, there is no urgency and if I get too overwhelmed I can quit. Simple. 

But, until I got to that point of realization I was swimming. Last week I had so much due in school and I was still closing every night. I was exhausted and I did some things I'm going to regret but at the end I learned that I needed to get my shit together. 

I think the reason I didn't want to tell my mom is because she would try and just give me money and I would much rather earn it. I hate feeling like I'm in debt to someone or like I owe them something. But going to college has been all I've wanted since I was in kindergarten. And mostly for the safe independence I have here. I won't let something like money bind me up again. So, it was either a job or prostitution and I think the more honest way is better.

At the end of all this, I'm fine though. I got it under control... For now.